12:43:00 AM

At The Edge of Darkness


I started my day with a thought-provoking, though rudimentary question: "What is at the edge of darkness?". Or perhaps, "What is at the edge of light?". The moment i opened my eyes to the still fresh lights of early morning, i was startled by such question. The obvious answer to the former question is of course light. At the edge of darkness is light, and subsequently, at the edge of light is darkness. But the provoking did not sprout from there. I started to generalize, and i think it is a good thing, that question to everything else in life: what is at the edge of love? at the edge of hate? at the edge of compassion? at the edge of apathy? at the edge of dreams? of hopes? of frustration? And so on. I promise i could go on forever, but then again, what is at the edge of forever? Questions after questions, and it can go on beyond the mind can comprehend. But i am more interested in the general outlook of darkness and light. Darkness being the negativities of life, and light, the contrast of darkness of course, the positivities of life.


Beyond our perceived reality, what exists? Beyond the the island on which we tread, what exists? Beyond the box in which we are placed unto, what exists? I think what constitutes and defines life is way bigger than what we truly think of it. Reality is never tantamounted to life, though it constitutes much of it, it's just isn't life. There is more to life than what actually meets the senses. Cliche as it may seem, it rings true wherever, whenever. Imagine if life is everything we see, how lethargic it would be.


If you did imagine, then you have installed yourself away from reality. I love that word, "installed". Sounds very mechanical. Reverting back to the topic: when we human persons are deprived of imagination, steadfastly holding only to what is tangible, then aren't we living a very monotonous life? As Opportunism purported, humans live one day at a time. We are capable of living without any guiding principles, without looking forward to anything, consciously! Aren't we always looking forward to something? Good or bad, for as long as it has not happened yet, and we suppose it to happen, then aren't we looking ahead? I do think it is impossible for us persons to not look what has not happened yet. C.D. Broads asserted that the future does not exist, only the past and the present do. It makes sense if you refuse to delve deeper. It sounds specious, so much so that it almost persuaded me into believing it. But if we look forward to something, imagine it almost at the verge of happening, then doesn't it exist? It may not be tangible, sensible, and outward, but it happened though only within the constructs of our mind, it existed. If we take into account the properties of memories, though it happened, it was once tangible, but along with the looking-forward-to's, it belongs within our mind. The only difference would be that one happened and one is supposed by us to happen. The future exists! For we will it to.


But not everything we will to happen, happens. As the simple, yet unequivocal adage goes ( i'm not too sure if it qualifies as an adage though) "Sh*t happens!". And it does! Things happen to us even if we do not will it to, even if we do not deliberately want to. It only goes to show that we cannot control everything in our lives. We may be the captains of our souls, but we aren't controlling the weather in which we are sailing. We are still determined by the things that are continually happening around us, good or bad. Then again, everything happens for a reason, sh*ts included. That also vindicates the deterministic nature of life. But i do not agree on the universality of the deterministic nature of everything. Some things just happens randomly, out of thin air. Spontaneity is still an admirable trait of life. Life therefore is spontaneous and determined.


What is at the edge of darkness? Is it light or is it still darkness? If we represent darkness as the opposite of love, what is at its edge? I believe, and i have so long ago held on to this tenet, that the opposite of love is not hate. For before you hate, you love. And hate is never the total and absolute absence of love. Love is omnipresent! The absence of it is the absence of feelings, therefore apathy. Leo Buscaglia once asserted that the opposite of love is apathy, and i believe so that it is. Not to care, not to consider, not to love at all is the other end of the paradigm. Does it therefore apply that at the edge of love is apathy? I hope so, but i also hope that beyond love is more love, and apathy is just a human failing that is unattainable and remains only within the realm of pessimistic thinking.


What is at the edge of darkness? That after every night comes day, beyond every shadow is the source of light with which it came to be. Beyond every failure, and at the edge of its every paremeter is the agent and the wanted end of the intention of succeeding. If you think of it within the context of shadow at noon, you can see clearly the paucity of shadows in relation to the plethora of the sun-lit road and whatnots. Analogically, if there'd be such a word, shadows can be represented as the shortcomings of our lives, and the sun-lit roads our successes. We should not dwell too much on these shadows, comforting as it may seem on their nature of shielding us from the scorching sun, it limits us only to one spot, and we won't be able to grow to the farthest reach of what we are capable of. Go out of that comfort zone. Bathe under the incessant source of life-giving rays of the sun. We are very much capable of anything, not everything though.


Darkness is always at the edge of light, and light at the edge of darkness. At the edge of love is apathy, at the edge of success are failures, at the edge of wishes is content, at the edge of passion is pity, at the edge of hope is helplessness. The edges of things in life always connects to another edge of life. Nothing ends if not beyond death! Live pleasantly on!

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